The 89th Psalm

1. I will sing of the mercies of the LORD for ever: with my mouth will I make known thy faithfulness to all generations. 1. I'll talk well of God unto nations everywhere: with my tongue I offer thanks, whilst I inform them of all His mercies.
2. For I have said, Mercy shall be built up for ever: thy faithfulness shalt thou establish in the very heavens. 2. If he hath a full share of thy basic truth, vision, and very pervasive belief, then trust me, he shall bless you.
3. I have made a covenant with my chosen, I have sworn unto David my servant, 3. My what an hymn divine! I vowed: Move over Satan! That accursed one, vanish!
4. Thy seed will I establish for ever, and build up thy throne to all generations. Selah. 4. The Lord's life power! By it thine sons, daughters, thou, and I shall be alive eternally.
5. And the heavens shall praise thy wonders, O LORD: thy faithfulness also in the congregation of the saints. 5. In the pews, refreshed saints chant songs of holy adoration. Ah, God's near! They'll have His full attentions.
6. For who in the heaven can be compared unto the LORD? who among the sons of the mighty can be likened unto the LORD? 6. Men beckon to honor with the letters M.S. Ph.D. huh? Fie! None can hold a candle to my God of nature who reigneth above.
7. God is greatly to be feared in the assembly of the saints, and to be had in reverence of all them that are about him. 7. O, don't abuse Diety's name. No, hereafter it's rather to be glorified, blessed by all men that have faith. Gotcha! Amen.
8. O LORD God of hosts, who is a strong LORD like unto thee? or to thy faithfulness round about thee? 8. So, suitable fond words of high honor and glory unto the Lord of earth? Let's seek to shout it out!
9. Thou rulest the raging of the sea: when the waves thereof arise, thou stillest them. 9. O, when the water level riseth high, thou sufferest it to assuage, settle, not harm, eh?
10. Thou hast broken Rahab in pieces, as one that is slain; thou hast scattered thine enemies with thy strong arm. 10. Egypt hast thou taken in a clash, a nation in sin which thou bombest to smithereens. Ah! it rests, rather erased!
11. The heavens are thine, the earth also is thine: as for the world and the fulness thereof, thou hast founded them. 11. Oh, the whole of the universe, the sun, and the stars therein, are denoted as His; for hath He not made all the stuff?
12. The north and the south thou hast created them: Tabor and Hermon shall rejoice in thy name. 12. The Master hath climbed the northern and southern mountains. Hear! total joy hath echoed.
13. Thou hast a mighty arm: strong is thy hand, and high is thy right hand. 13. Gory truth is: God hath this handy smashing right, and hath hit many.
14. Justice and judgment are the habitation of thy throne: mercy and truth shall go before thy face. 14. Halt thou at neat chamber of truth by the residence of God, find joy. Try man! Just inhale the grace!
15. Blessed is the people that know the joyful sound: they shall walk, O LORD, in the light of thy countenance. 15. Feel holy: with noble tone, the lute with the non-discordant notes had the Jesus folks all happy-go-lucky.
16. In thy name shall they rejoice all the day: and in thy righteousness shall they be exalted. 16. Oh, thy excellent holiness! Ah, enthralled by it, they hail thy many just, learned sage ideas.
17. For thou art the glory of their strength: and in thy favour our horn shall be exalted. 17. The ardent or saintly brother exults half-fortnightly: "Hurrah to our God of Heaven!"
18. For the LORD is our defence; and the Holy One of Israel is our king. 18. Irked, our royal hero, God, chased foes off to intense ruin in Hell.
19. Then thou spakest in vision to thy holy one, and saidst, I have laid help upon one that is mighty; I have exalted one chosen out of the people. 19.  Hath not Samuel eyed the aptly-chosen David to oppose the vexed house of the evil king Saul? Oh! annihilate it! Is this not one happy notion?
20. I have found David my servant; with my holy oil have I anointed him: 20. I've laid my holy hand on this, a very devout man; I vowed faith in him.
21. With whom my hand shall be established: mine arm also shall strengthen him. 21. Ah, the Lord's might! Wasn't I, a son, blessed by Him? What men in Hell shall harm me?
22. The enemy shall not exact upon him; nor the son of wickedness afflict him. 22. Man's malcontented ex-wife can scoff: Shhh! So then: Like it or lump it, honey!
23. And I will beat down his foes before his face, and plague them that hate him. 23. Aha! if God will bust the bad, anal men who hate him, he is fine, safe, protected.
24. But my faithfulness and my mercy shall be with him: and in my name shall his horn be exalted. 24. He said: "I'll hunt down all the many filthy men." Exclaim, "Fry them!" (as He maims, burns) Shabby end!
25. I will set his hand also in the sea, and his right hand in the rivers. 25. He, sir? Stall? He had his sails in the north wind; he navigated in, sir.
26. He shall cry unto me, Thou art my father, my God, and the rock of my salvation. 26. Shall David make merry on account of a stone myth? Ah, the glory of my truth!
27. Also I will make him my firstborn, higher than the kings of the earth. 27. Interfering, his Father shall knight him; make the royals bow to him.
28. My mercy will I keep for him for evermore, and my covenant shall stand fast with him. 28. He'll have my terrific kindness, warmth, company, and the relief of my immortal vows.
29. His seed also will I make to endure for ever, and his throne as the days of heaven. 29. Heirs of David are now like the sand of the sea. Master, never end his loyal house.
30. If his children forsake my law, and walk not in my judgments; 30. A sinful kid down-right jests? My command: awaken in Hell, fry!
31. If they break my statutes, and keep not my commandments;  31. Nuts! They tempt and make a bad mockery of my sentiments.
32. Then will I visit their transgression with the rod, and their iniquity with stripes. 32.  How wilt I inspire sinners to quit dirty evil? It's with ten right hard hits in the arse!
33. Nevertheless my lovingkindness will I not utterly take from him, nor suffer my faithfulness to fail. 33. Evil ensnares my folks in sin? Truly I'll make for them a new sort of gift: the fullness of my divine truth.
34. My covenant will I not break, nor alter the thing that is gone out of my lips. 34. Oh, I'll not vary the firm lasting spoken agreement. Why? I cannot blot it out.
35. Once have I sworn by my holiness that I will not lie unto David. 35. Oh, I ban every evil that would do in my chosen saints, will I not?
36. His seed shall endure for ever, and his throne as the sun before me. 36. His house hears Heaven's offer: send innumerable toddlers there.
37. It shall be established for ever as the moon, and as a faithful witness in heaven. Selah. 37. Above the stars shall the issue of David, man of faith, be seen. He will shine as a lantern. 
38. But thou hast cast off and abhorred, thou hast been wroth with thine anointed. 38. But now Satan buffeteth the warrior, and doth itch to banish: "Oh, end that house!"
39. Thou hast made void the covenant of thy servant: thou hast profaned his crown by casting it to the ground. 39. Thou abandonest David. Oh! that devout son hath thy scorn: a mighty prince of vast forces, now in the gutter.
40. Thou hast broken down all his hedges; thou hast brought his strong holds to ruin. 40. Look! he hath not this God's blessings; sword hath augured hurt. Both insult honor.
41. All that pass by the way spoil him: he is a reproach to his neighbours. 41. Global hostilities harass, eh! Boy! is he this unhappy camper, or what?!
42. Thou hast set up the right hand of his adversaries; thou hast made all his enemies to rejoice. 42. Rather, his hated foe had cause to jest at, and outright humiliate him over his hopelessness.
43. Thou hast also turned the edge of his sword, and hast not made him to stand in the battle. 43. Thou didst abandon him. Oh! this lad, he's a defenseless target to men that want to do hurt.
44. Thou hast made his glory to cease, and cast his throne down to the ground. 44. O! now he doth get no acclaim; his treasury hath gone to dross and the dust.
45. The days of his youth hast thou shortened: thou hast covered him with shame. Selah. 45. He hath had years trimmed; SOS! the house of thy chosen, who hid out, hath vile status.
46. How long, LORD? wilt thou hide thyself for ever? shall thy wrath burn like fire? 46. Looking forth, I worry; withhold thy fires! When shall full truth be revealed?
47. Remember how short my time is: wherefore hast thou made all men in vain? 47. Mortal man? He has one brief misery. Then to mud, where vile worms eat him.
48. What man is he that liveth, and shall not see death? shall he deliver his soul from the hand of the grave? Selah. 48. Adam's will: he that hath life avoideth not Sheol: the lush arrangements of Heaven; the devil's sad harsh Hell.
49. Lord, where are thy former lovingkindnesses, which thou swarest unto David in thy truth?  49. Ah, why didst thou ever shrink from holy covenants? Didst thou rewrite the unerring laws?
50. Remember, Lord, the reproach of thy servants; how I do bear in my bosom the reproach of all the mighty people; 50. God save me from the horror of embarrasment. They who prosper bellyache; my hired help leap in to bitch, too.
51. Wherewith thine enemies have reproached, O LORD; wherewith they have reproached the footsteps of thine anointed. 51. Even thine own worst foe hath made sport of thee, O prince. Everywhere in Israel he hath derided thee. Oh! How pathetic!
52. Blessed be the LORD for evermore. Amen, and Amen. 52. Remember to defend Heaven's dear noble morals.